messy,

So life is weird.

Some how I'm completely over you and moving on to a new chapter of my life. Maybe even a new person. But I think that that may just be a vicious cycle too. We like things to be cut and dry. We like clean edges. But life sometimes isn't like that. Who am I kidding. Life is always messy. But it's the beautiful mess that makes it beautiful.

I was in the back of the theater Friday night. You are on lights for this production. I wasn't in your way. I wasn't loud. D and I sat in the corner and worked on costumes. We were in no one's way.

You thought I was out of hearing.

"Why are they here...they can come tomorrow night."

There was such distaste in your words. I thought that we might be friends again. Maybe even soon. We still get each other. More than we may care to admit. and I thought that after the lunch where we had conversation that things would improve. But you've also made amends with it. She actually defended me more than you. She is more my friend now than you are.

I'm stuck on B.
He wants to stay single.
We friend zoned each other last week.
I straight up made a pact with him this summer that we would always just be friends.

I don't think he's the right one for me.

He's just a friend that I currently greatly need.

"The older that I get, the less that I regret."